It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover Book Review + Quotes

I’ve been reading a handful of romance novels for the past months which had me feeling “meh” to “I feel so single it hurts”.

Being in quarantine, I found myself reaching out for books to read again. I would honestly get bored because I’ve been finding ‘okay’ books and I really wanted to find a book I could fall in love again with.

One typical night last March, I was scrolling through TikTok and I found a video about this specific book “It Ends with Us” by Colleen Hoover. There was so much hype in the comment section about how much they loved the book.

I was really intrigued as to why people loved the book so much. I was honestly prepared to be disappointed because nowadays, people hype up something so much and when you read it, it’s not really as good as you thought it would be.

I didn’t want to miss out in case it really proves the hype, so I decided to read it.

Before we dive in to my review, let me give you a little background about the book.

Synopsis:

Sometimes it is the one who loves you who hurts you the most.

Lily hasn’t always had it easy, but that’s never stopped her from working hard for the life she wants. She’s come a long way from the small town in Maine where she grew up—she graduated from college, moved to Boston, and started her own business. So when she feels a spark with a gorgeous neurosurgeon named Ryle Kincaid, everything in Lily’s life suddenly seems almost too good to be true.

Ryle is assertive, stubborn, maybe even a little arrogant. He’s also sensitive, brilliant, and has a total soft spot for Lily. And the way he looks in scrubs certainly doesn’t hurt. Lily can’t get him out of her head. But Ryle’s complete aversion to relationships is disturbing. Even as Lily finds herself becoming the exception to his “no dating” rule, she can’t help but wonder what made him that way in the first place.

As questions about her new relationship overwhelm her, so do thoughts of Atlas Corrigan—her first love and a link to the past she left behind. He was her kindred spirit, her protector. When Atlas suddenly reappears, everything Lily has built with Ryle is threatened.

With this bold and deeply personal novel, Colleen Hoover delivers a heart-wrenching story that breaks exciting new ground for her as a writer. Combining a captivating romance with a cast of all-too-human characters, It Ends with Us is an unforgettable tale of love that comes at the ultimate price.

***

(Have you tried reading a book with a background music? This is actually the first time I ever tried that. I played a reading playlist on Spotify that made me connect to the book on a deeper level. You should try it too!)

Now, back the book.

It’s rare for me to fall in love with the first chapter of the book. In this one, I did. It’s the kind of book the you’re excited to know how the story’s going to unfold. I really loved the way Colleen Hoover wrote this book – the sequence of events and the backstory.

One of the main reasons why I loved this book is that it’s realistic. I love stories that you could see happening in real life. It’s something people could actually relate to and learn from.

I mentioned the realistic side because I know a lot of romance fiction with stories that are just too good to be true. Those that come off super cheesy and unrealistically. To be honest, I find it hard to finish reading a book with that kind of story. They have this multiple plot twists that are really unnecessary and could’ve been better off with.

Contrariwise, this book is so well-written, considering the high rating it has on Goodreads (4.8 stars).

If there’s one book I hope people should read at least once in their life, this would be it. I personally learned a lot from this. This book could help a lot more people who reaches the message of this story.

Halfway through finishing the book, I found myself crying while washing the dishes. It was a moment I will never forget, not because of some random chapter from a book, but because I know what I was crying about actually happens in real life too.

This book broke my heart to an extent I didn’t prepare my heart for. I read this book in less than 24 hours because it’s really hard to put it down.

So if you’re looking for a book to add on your TBR list, I really do recommend this one.

I mean it, read it and share it to everyone you know. I feel like a lot of people, especially women, should get the message of this book and keep it inside their hearts.

We, women, are special and should be treated and loved right. No buts.

To wrap this up, I’m going to share some of the lines that resonated with me in this book. I always do this to any book that I read – I jot down the lines that I find beautiful so I can read it anytime and remember why I loved the book so much.

“The last thing I want you to do is lose sight of your limit. Please don’t allow that to happen.”

“I know that you believe he loves you, and I’m sure he does. Bu he’s not loving you the right way. He doesn’t love you the way you deserve to be loved. If he truly loves you, he wouldn’t allow you to take him back. He would make the decision to leave you himself so that he knows for a fact he can never hurt you again. That’s the kind of love a woman deserves.”

“My eyes fill with tears, and not for myself this time. I cry for Ryle. Because even though he’s responsible for the situation he’s in, I know how sad he is about it. And when you love someone, seeing them sad also makes you sad.”

***

I give this book a 5-star rating. No doubt.

If you’re going to read this book, please prepare your heart because it’s gonna be broken into tiny little pieces. Prepare your eyes because you’ll cry them out for sure. Lastly, make sure you still have enough issue to wipe those tears out. Or you could use your blanket like I did.

What are your thoughts about It Ends with Us? Have you read it already? What book should I read next?

I’d love to chat with you in the comments! ❤

Background Photo in Feature Image Credits:
Anika | Chapters of May - Books and Lifestyle Blog via Pinterest

How Prioritizing Mental Health Led Me to Making Better Life Decisions

                Back to the days without COVID, I was that typical college girl who walks around hustling inside the campus while holding papers on one hand and a cup of coffee on the other. Most people don’t really like studying but I actually do. I love to study hard. I love getting no sleep because I was busy perfecting a school project. I love skipping meals because I have org meetings during my vacant time. I didn’t understand why some people hated the school hustle, but I never wanted to know why. Because I had so little time to be finding answers for that.

                If I could describe what my life was like before, it would be “fast-paced”. Lots of things are happening every second and I had to accomplish at least a couple of things every hour. The older I got, the more inclined I became in that lifestyle. Maybe it was the people-pleaser in me? Or did I just simply enjoy what I was doing?

                COVID, oh, COVID. If there was really a silver lining in you, I strongly believe that it’s the realizations in life you imparted on people. In just a span of a year, I completely changed. Turns out that ‘changing for the better’ is unquestionably easier said than done. Transitioning is SO messy. Far, far messier from what I expected.

                I know I’m not alone who spent most nights during the first few months of the quarantine crying my eyes out to sleep because of a really chaotic transitioning phase. From feeling like a bird flying freely, quarantine tore both of my wings and I had nowhere to go from then on. I felt suffocated. I didn’t even want to be around my family. I wanted to leave so badly but I was afraid of catching the virus plus I had nowhere to run to. I had a really bad relationship with my family members that time because I took all of my frustrations out on them. I found myself drowning with all the org tasks and academic papers because it’s the only sense of direction I saw that time. Every tasks accomplished used to always make me feel like I’m moving forward; like I’m a step closer to my destination. But this time, it was different. No matter how many tasks I accomplish, I still feel like I was stuck.

                But everyone’s expecting you to be that student who does everything and never complains – that kept repeating inside my head. It was torture. Whenever I felt like I didn’t want to do something, I had no choice but to do it anyway. Months have passed that I didn’t allow myself to rest because of people’s expectations of me and all I had was a major burnout. I felt really empty that I couldn’t do even a small task anymore.

                I deleted my social media apps. I stopped responding to messages and calls – even to my friends. I just wanted to disappear into a void where no one can see me. I was so ashamed that time because I felt so powerless. I knew my identity was this studious person and a compassionate friend who’s always, ALWAYS there one call or text away. But I just couldn’t be that anymore.

                It was approximately a month of ignoring everyone and my social anxiety just got worse. I realized that maybe it was because I wasn’t dealing with the problem – I was running away from it.

                Eventually, I decided to reply back to some of the messages. It was so hard getting back online and seeing all the unread messages sitting on my inbox. But I had to face it. Days then went on and I felt slightly better. But I never really told anyone why I disappeared.

                The real reason was that, for the first time, I felt tired. For my whole life, I’ve been running around doing this and that for other people’s validation and that was the first time I admitted to myself that I didn’t want to do it anymore. I don’t want to be a people-pleaser anymore. It’s exhausting. That was when I decided to put my mental health first, above anything.

                I expected all the negative responses I got from my family, friends, and my teachers. I’ve accepted it. At some point, we really got to let people down to be able to say yes to ourselves. That was the very first time I told them about what I want for me and not what they want for me.

                6 months later, I caught up with my friend who didn’t enroll for the semester when she found out I wasn’t enrolling too. I looked back to everything that has happened to me for the past one and a half year and I must say, this is the happiest that I’ve become. I’ve been eating right, working out, getting a decent amount of sleep, and I actually had the time to grieve when I needed to. It was something I couldn’t do before because I was too busy doing tasks I wasn’t even getting any sleep. I had no time to cry even when the time I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me. It was like an honest hell on earth.

                Prioritizing my mental health kept me sane. I’m certain that if I didn’t have the courage to let people down, I’d be twice as worse than I was before. I’d be meaner to my family members. I’d be miserable. All that because I’m not letting myself become a human who needs proper day-to-day routine.

                Now, I’m asking you. Do you feel miserable right now? Why is that? Reflect on how have you been treating yourself lately. Are you allowing yourself to rest? If you’re disregarding these rudimentary life routines, that’s a disrespect to yourself. That must be the reason why you hate yourself so much. That must also be the reason why you pose that hate to people around you.

                I am reminding you to please, please look after yourself. Love yourself enough that you will not allow yourself to feel hatred towards yourself. Little steps do matter, and I want you to try taking that step to loving yourself more right now.

                Please, do this for you.

Featured photo source: ADORED VINTAGE June 2018 Lookbook by Briana Morrison via Pinterest.com

Afternoon Appreciation

What’s your favorite time of the day?

Mine’s during the afternoon. As much as I want to become a morning person, I can’t still find myself waking up earlier than my normal waking hours. I don’t like how waking up at 8 am feels like just an hour or two to pull my morning routine altogether. I like slow mornings. However, I tend to be in such a rush to spend my morning moments from 8 am because I usually prepare lunch already at around 10 am. From that time onwards, I just get so busy.

That’s how I grow into loving slow afternoons. Is it just me or does anybody feel that everything just moves slower in the afternoon? I feel like it’s also a quiet time great for self-reflection while sipping a cup of coffee or listening to a music you like.

I usually spend my afternoons snuggling with my cats, taking cool baths, and listening to an inspiring podcast. I don’t always achieve slow mornings and I feel like the afternoon is a chance to fix a bad day. Being in such a rush in the morning, a lot of things could really go wrong. But having a chance in the afternoon to pull yourself together always works for me.

How about you? How do you spend your afternoons?

a short story i wrote last night because i couldn’t sleep

Around 5:30 pm, the sun was setting. He had her wrapped around his arms as they watched the sun go down.

Was it too fast to be alone together when they’ve only met twice?

She closed her eyes as she tries to be in the moment – remembering his warmth, the smell of the grass they were sitting on, and the sound of the crowdless surroundings.

They were breathing at the same pace, holding each other without saying anything.

She then turned to him and said, “I don’t love you. But I really like you though.”

His eyes looked confused as if saying that he needs to hear more than just that.

She goes on saying, “If I love you, I would tell you. I’d be honest about it. I don’t want to say that I love you because that’s not how I feel about you right now.”

He locked his gaze at her. She felt distracted by his deep-set brown eyes that she had to look around while saying the next words she needed to tell him: “You see, love is something really deep. It takes time to know you love someone.”

She looked back at him slowly.

“It takes more conversations than the ones we’ve had; more days and nights spent together; more loud and quiet moments with you,” she said, almost whispering. Words came out of her mouth as if they were fading out.

She straightened her dress for no reason before going back to her position before she spoke. She liked being held by the guy she’d only met once before this blissful afternoon.

“I just don’t love you yet. But I just know that I will love you soon.”

Part of her thinks that maybe she’s just being a hopeless romantic again. But she just wants to be honest about her feelings.

She likes it there in his arms. Hearing his beating heart, even without saying anything, she knew he likes her there too.

Let’s Talk About: My 6-month-long Hiatus

I have to be honest, it feels so different to be back & feel like I’m starting all over again.

It’s been half a year – HALF A YEAR – since I disappeared from the blogosphere. I never even said goodbye or announced that I was going on a really long hiatus because I didn’t really anticipate it.

Blogging has been a big part of my life that I just couldn’t imagine a life without it. The real culprit was my busy schedule as a college student, which I totally did not see coming. As much as I wanted to write for the blog, it was either I had no time or I felt so tired to even get myself to write.

Then the pandemic came. I had no reason to say that I had no time or too tired to come up with a blog post but there I was being very anxious to be back. I had that feeling of guilt that I did not say a word before I left and I was unsure if I would still have something to get back to. I literally came to the point where I thought that maybe I should just call it quits.

For a whole two months of being in quarantine, I didn’t visit my blog and I decided to not think about it. I even deleted the WordPress app on my phone. Until one day I just couldn’t take it. I stayed in bed for hours scrolling through my old posts and reading the old comments. I was so jealous of that version of me having people to talk to from around the world. Someone who actually does something productive and shares positivity to the world. I was hurting that I even cried. It was heartbreaking for me.

I tried my best to fight my anxiousness of “not having something to get back to” so I wrote a blog post last month about how I’m trying to overcome anxiety during quarantine through music. Pressing the publish button felt so freeing for me. It’s like I finally broke the wall where I was hiding from and I was so ready to respond to comments, to talk to people again, and be the version of myself I envied just a few days ago.

But it didn’t turn out that way.

I had 4 people who liked my post. One of them was my boyfriend. Which means I brushed my anxiety away only for 3 people. My anxiety just got worse.

That was the time when I finally talked myself down to just quit blogging because maybe it really just wasn’t for me. So I did.

Four days ago, my boyfriend and I got into a huge fight. The typical Ryry move was to go to my blog, pour my heart out into writing or poetry, and publish it on my blog while I’m still crying. Yep, I’m on that dramatic level when I’m hurt. Surprisingly, I wrote a poem. I haven’t written a poem for months even though I forced myself to. That night I just did – for like, fifteen minutes.

I was really shocked that I got myself into writing again for the blog without even thinking about my anxiety. I just straight up wrote and posted it without thinking twice. And it felt REALLY good. I still got 4 likes but it felt different now. I am happy with it. (at least all of them were bloggers and not my boyfriend hahaha)

I realized that I was just lacking inspiration that’s why I couldn’t write before. My mind was busy thinking about other things that I just couldn’t make time for my blog. And I wasn’t mad at my boyfriend anymore because that fight got me into writing again and surprisingly inspired me to write more.

I’m more myself when I write.

Right now, I’m starting to really engage on my blog’s social media accounts which I have been failing on doing before. I’m doing a really good job right now that my recent tweet just blew up and I have met so many amazing bloggers! I can’t be any happier now that I triumphantly pushed my anxiety away.

If you’ve been following me since the previous years of my blog, no, I did not choose to stop blogging or be on that long hiatus. It was a matter of questioning myself and piecing myself back together again. It wasn’t easy. But it was definitely something that I learned so much from.

Being away and having all those thoughts in my head seem to make more sense now. Taking a rest is something any of us shouldn’t feel guilty of doing. I felt guilty about it that’s why I suffered and had breakdowns. But for you, if ever you’re not feeling like writing, NEVER feel bad about thinking to take a break. You deserve it from all the hard work you make.

Trust me, I got through it and I do not regret the rest I have taken 🙂

songs that help me go through quarantining ♫

so much has happened and is happening yet here i am with a blog post about my playlist. i know, very irrelevant.

to be honest, i don’t know anymore. i figured we’re just all surviving each day despite what’s happening around us. so much respect to everyone who cares and does not waste their opportunities to use their voices.

if you’re reading this, i want you to appreciate how long you’ve come and how you’re still choosing to live and to do what’s right in the midst of the cruelty we’re all seeing right now. i only have spent 4 times of just laying in bed, crying, and skipping meals for on and off anxiety attacks. we all have different ways of handling problems and coping with them. turns out mine’s through listening to some music.

if ever you’re feeling the same way and you’re just tired and want to zone everything out, i want to share with you the music i’ve been listening to to try and get by this quarantine.

allow yourself to have some “escape” through all these problems we’re facing with our eyes closed. it might not be possible to get away because we’re stuck at home, which makes this way worse, but we always have the choice to just be still and find our inner peace.

here are the songs that help me go through all these. hope you like them 🙂

please notice // christian leave

if my 16-year-old soul never left me, i’d probably be screaming and having christian leave in my phone lock screen. ever since i got to hear this song, it always made me feel something i couldn’t explain. it resembles how im feeling inside, (probably every song i listen to), how it’s loudly quiet. it’s as if i’m screaming but with soothing notes on it. i’m obsessed with this song and hits me differently. hope you’ll take a moment to listen to it!

i love you so // the walters

i don’t hate why i’m almost always singing this. i first heard this song in sara king’s cover (which is SO GOOD btw u have to listen to it). i love love love listening to the walters. their songs make me calm, specifically this one, even though i do not relate to the lyrics at all. it’s just a complete masterpiece.

i don’t wanna be okay without you // charlie burg

another artist i am praising right now. i love how charlie burg’s voice makes me just want to either cry or smile nonstop. i can imagine myself being in an indie romance movie and this is the background music. that shit would be so good 😭

huwag kang matakot // reese lansangan

in english, it means “don’t be afraid”. this is an OPM song that i certainly would recommend you to listen to. as you probably don’t know, i have a boyfriend now (lol i know) and i’ve last seen him 6 months ago. it’ll probably take much longer because of this pandemic and because of his military training, where he’s not going to be able to communicate with me for half a year. it’s scary. we both get scared and this song reminds us to not be afraid because we’ll both get through this. i’m sure this will hit different when we’re not going to be able to talk to each other anymore 😦

let’s fall in love for the night, i don’t miss you at all, break my heart again, etc // finneas

nobody’s asked me this, but finneas is definitely one of my most favorite musicians ever. his songs are those kinds that make me wanna spin and dance around the kitchen like no one’s watching. i’m a huge fan of claudia and his relationship and i can’t help but feel happy as his songs remind me so much of the both of them ❤

watch you sleep // girl in red

once this song played, there’s no way you can talk to me, interrupt me, or make me put my headphones down because this is just so good!! girl in red is one of my faves lately. this song specifically is very soothing and calming, just what i needed during this time. thank you to all the musicians who make the kind of music we definitely need at certain times like this.

it’s okay // clara benin

year 2017 and below, i never actually listened to OPM because i didn’t really like how opm musicians make music. turns out i was just missing out artists like clara benin. i figured i just didn’t like anything that’s mainstream. this song is about the “new normal” and is really one of the songs that helps me have hope for tomorrows even when there’s been crazy situations happening around us. this is definitely worth the time to listen to.

---

i still have lots of songs to share, like songs from lana del rey, clairo, the honeysticks, dayglow, and keiko necessario, but if i keep going this post would be really long 😂 i would recommend you listening to these artists because they’re just so different and so good. it makes me very emotional just listening to them.

i already i apologize for the length of this post at this point but let me just say a few words before ending this.

in my country, the Anti-Terrorism Bill has been raging over by the citizens for this will basically take our human rights for freedom of speech, etc. we cannot live in a country where we would plea for the injustices of the government and be called as a terrorist right after. there is so much wrong with the bill that our lives would not be the same anymore once this bill is pushed through. if you’ve got any chance, please help us by signing petitions and spreading this on social media so that more people could help and be aware of how this will affect the lives of the Filipino people.

another one is the Black Lives Matter movement. it pains me to see how many blacks are being shamed and worse, being physically attacked because of their race and skin color. let us use our voices and abilities to help restore humanity by fighting for our rights as humans. not only for the blacks, not only for a specific race but all rights of all the creatures here on earth.

let us sign petitions, donate if we can, and make use of the publicity to educate and make people aware of all the issues we are all facing today.

it is not an easy task to change society and better it. we are just individuals who are fighting different battles every day. as much as we want to tell everyone to ACT, we can never actually force them to, for we don’t know what they’re going through or what their beliefs are. we cannot force someone to fight for something when they also have something heavy on their shoulders at the moment. let us focus on doing our best for what we know is right and influence those people who could help us in restoring what’s been long missing in our humanity.

let us awaken people’s minds but keep the goodness within ourselves. we cannot fix a violent act by doing another violence. let us also not forget to have faith in Him and ask Him to help us and the people in the positions to have the minds that actually care for the welfare of everyone.

we can do this. i don’t know how you all are coping with these, but i know we can triumph over these if we just keep trying. every day we just keep trying and we never stop in fighting for what’s right.

we got this.

life update // happy december!

A week ago, I told myself that I’ll start to become a morning person. But here I am at almost 2 am sitting in front of my laptop, writing for the blog.

Needless to mention, I also have a class at 8:30 tomorrow. Or should I say later?

But let’s look on the bright side: I’m actually writing for the blog, I am back, it’s the last month of the year, and it’s gonna be Christmas soon. That sounds more fun, right? Let us not think about how the hell am I going to roll out of bed later and wish for a miracle that I’m not going to be late.

Well, hello, my dear. I’m going to stop ranting and start talking about what the point of this post is all about. YOUR GIRL KINDA WENT MISSING FOR ALMOST 5 MONTHS IN THE BLOGOSPHERE!!!

I have been posting – writings that I just came up with while or after having coffee, or more accurately after having a painful heartbreak or experiencing how it feels to fall in love like oh my god this is sounding way toocheesynowibetterstop.

* clears throat *

Ladies and gents, here are the reasons why Ryry hasn’t been active on the blog. 

c o l l e g e

So apparently, I’m in college now and I now have a completely different lifestyle than what I had before I moved to the city. Looking back to my February Diaries, I can tell how much I’ve matured mentally & emotionally and if you know me personally, I literally improved so much. I’m no longer that 18-year-old girl who looked like 12. I definitely look more mature now. Thank God.

Anyways, college life has been very busy. I barely have time to just sit and relax. Meaning, I just couldn’t make time for regular blogging anymore. But the good thing is, just like what I expected I like college so so so much.

This was the first time I ever went out of my town and live independently. I’ve always been fascinated with the idea of moving to another place, meeting new people, and starting a new life – I definitely think this was it.

t h e a t e r

If you’ve been following me on my socials (if not, everything is linked at the sidebar 😘) you might have seen my posts about “Dementia” – my first ever play. I got the lead role (Sophia) and it was sooo fun and overwhelming to finally be doing something that I truly am passionate about. Winning an academy award for best actress was one of my ultimate dreams, according to the 17-year-old Ryry in a post last year 😂 For now, being able to perform in front of thousands of people feels truly amazing to me ❤

Acting is fun but being part of the production team for me is wayyy more fun because it’s way more tiring and stressful that’s why it feels more rewarding when a play production becomes successful. I’ve been a part of both acting and prod team and I am proud to say that I’m not getting enough sleep yet I am so productive the entire day. And night. But I am enjoying my time SO MUCH in this theater organization I am in and that’s what matters the most :))

It’s almost 3 and I’m still awake. When will I ever learn to sleep early??? (ooh I just suddenly thought of writing ‘get enough sleep‘ in my new year’s resolution) 😂

I guess those are just some of the major reasons why I couldn’t blog and those are also to update you on what’s happening in my life right now because yeah I’m still alive and breathing, I was just really busy 😂 I’m excited to start Blogmas! I’m thinking of formally starting Blogmas this year since it went all over the place last year. But since I still don’t know whether I’ll be busy or not this month, I can’t promise – but I really want to and I’ll still find a way 🙂

I would be so glad if you tell me what’s the biggest thing or the most exciting thing that’s happening in your life right now! I missed chatting with all of you ❤

comment away!

from the coffee shop

she looked over her shoulder
to see how far she was
from the broken old her.

she smiled and looked straight ahead
and then there was him.
how they both wished this would never end.

soon he’ll leave
but in her heart he’ll stay
and in his heart she’ll stay.

it was an unpredictable ride
never knowing they’d find love
from the friendship they once had

living in the moment
a love that started from a coffee shop
hoping how their hearts beat never stops.

i’ll wait.

the smell of coffee in the afternoon air welcomed me as i walked inside our favorite coffee shop.

it only meant that i’ll see you again.

we switched places because i don’t wanna recall the pain i felt when we had a misunderstanding the last time we were here.

i grabbed my coffee, took a sip, and we started telling stories about ourselves.

we want to know each other better. we want to hear the words from our mouths without being sugar coated even by little lies.

we stayed there for two hours while having deep conversations like we’re the only ones in the room.

at eight, we decided to go out the city.

we took the bus and went to the lake. we strolled along the lakeside for minutes and sat on the grass where we could see the lights reflecting on the water perfectly.

i leaned on to you as you wrapped your arms around me.

the feeling was so good that it hurts.

i looked up to see a few stars shining above us. i wish there were more of them.

i went back to see the reflection of the lights in the lake. i love how simple things like this make me so happy.

we stayed there for three hours – no phones, just the two of us.

we talked about serious things and my heart skips a beat everytime you said something sweet about me.

i wish it could be like that forever.

i wonder if i never met you.. where would i be that night?

alone in my bedroom, for sure.

i’m so happy i met you. i’m so happy that i finally met someone who helped me see my worth, to find out who i really am, and appreciate all of it despite the imperfections i have.

when you leave, i’ll miss the same feeling i felt whenever we’re inside that coffee shop. i’ll miss the feeling i had while we watch the lights from the lakeside outside the city.

i’ll have to wait for a year to see you again and spend a special night like this with you again.

it will be hard but it will be worth the wait.

it may feel like forever – still, i’ll wait.

September 25th

She felt perfect that day. She was gonna meet him again. It was all rainbows and butterflies until it rained.

Her mood suddenly changed. She wouldn’t respond to his messages at all. She was supposed to meet him.

She was annoyed but she wanted to feel his comfort.

So they met.

She was still not in the mood to talk. But he was different. He touched her like no one ever has.

He brushed his lips unto her cheeks – then to her lips.

Her heartbeat became faster. I haven’t had a first kiss. I’m afraid I don’t know how to kiss, she thought.

He kissed her.

And the world disappeared.

She couldn’t quite feel anything.

Was it right? Was it wrong? Was it worth it? Was it not?

Nevertheless, she felt important. She felt special.

He held unto her like he wasn’t gonna leave. So tightly like he’s gonna make it last forever.

The time has come to an end.

She had to leave. Even if she wanted more.

They both wanted more.

Was it right? Was it wrong? Was it worth it? Was it not?

Nevertheless, she felt important. She felt special.

She hoped that the way he held unto her meant he wasn’t gonna leave her – and that they would last forever.